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Wallpapers tagged with "one liner"
Displaying 1 - 25 of 67 Items
You know, somebody actually You know, somebody actually

by Qrazy Quotes


A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly too.' - Tommy Cooper A woman tells her doctor, 'I'...

by Qrazy Quotes


I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio. - Rodney Dangerfield I could tell that my parents ...

by Qrazy Quotes


A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's. She changes it more often. - Oliver Herford A woman's mind is cleaner tha...

by Qrazy Quotes


Muggers demand your money or your life; women require both. - Samuel Butler Muggers demand your money or ...

by Qrazy Quotes


A girl phoned me the other day and said ... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home. - Rodney Dangerfield A girl phoned me the other da...

by Qrazy Quotes


Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. - Dale Carnegie Remember, today is the tomorr...

by Qrazy Quotes


I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades - Demetri Martin I think the worst time to hav...

by Qrazy Quotes


Man has will, but woman has her way. - Oliver Wendell Holmes Man has will, but woman has h...

by Qrazy Quotes


Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? ...He's a mile away and you've got his shoes. - Billy Connolly Before you judge a man, walk ...

by Qrazy Quotes


I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. - Rodney Dangerfiled I remember the time I was kid...

by Qrazy Quotes


Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Ch Apparently, 1 in 5 people in ...

by Qrazy Quotes


The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites'. - Larry Hardiman The word 'politics' is derive...

by Qrazy Quotes


I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Thyroid problem?' - Emo Philips I saw a woman wearing a sweat...

by Qrazy Quotes


My Father would thrash me every now and then. He'd talk while he did it too! He'd hit me and shout, 'Have you had enough?' Had enough? What kind of question is that? 'Why, Father, would another kick i My Father would thrash me eve...

by Qrazy Quotes


A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, A man falls down a flight of ...

by Qrazy Quotes


Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby Human beings are the only cre...

by Qrazy Quotes


A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. - W.C. Fields A woman drove me to drink and...

by Qrazy Quotes


I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough. I saw six men kicking and pun...

by Qrazy Quotes


Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names. But one day I turned to my bullies and said - 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me', and it worked! Fro Well I was bullied at school,...

by Qrazy Quotes


Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. - Mark Twain Of all the things I've lost, ...

by Qrazy Quotes


At 38 years, I finally got me the woman that said those six words I wanted all my life to hear: 'My dad owns a liquor store.' - Mark Klein At 38 years, I finally got me...

by Qrazy Quotes


I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. - W.C. Fields I am free of all prejudices. ...

by Qrazy Quotes


I wanna pikachu I wanna pikachu

by Shizzle Stuffs


So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I want to go somewhere I've never been before.' I said, 'Try the kitchen.' - Henny Youngman So I said, 'Where do you want...

by Qrazy Quotes


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